The Trouble with Hope
by happyyethopeless
Summary: When Mikasa returns to Shinganshina under the request of Commander Levi, she finds herself trapped with fulfilling Armin's last request before he died. To take care of Annie Leonhardt, no matter what.
1. I

**The Trouble with Hope**

At first glance, Annie resembles an emaciated troll.

Mikasa did not recognize her at first. The blonde talking to herself at the foot of a judge did not look like the Annie she knew.

Annie's voice, at first, quiet and firm, now pours out in a panicked rhythm, stuttering over her fervent speech.

Mikasa watches the blonde's shoulders slump. She pays attention to Annie's widened eyes and shivering form. No band holds the former soldier's hair up. Annie's hair now fell past her shoulders, stopping at the small of her back.

It is an unruly mess, matted up after days of no washing. The peasant dress Annie wears is dark at the hems. The apron of her dress is muddy. Annie has not taken a shower since she was thrown in the dungeons.

The judge impatiently taps his fingers over oak wood.

"Well," he says. "What is your complaint?"

A young man sits on the sides near the jury. Dark hair cropped, face clean shaven, the man looks like a capable fighter. But Mikasa sees that he bears no war scars despite the fact that he fought in the Great War ten years ago. His eyes take on a glassy tone, posture straight and rigid.

The man looks as though he has something better to do than sit at a trial. He looks around the courtroom for a bit, chewing at something. Mikasa does not let her gaze waver when his forest green eyes lands on her.

His face soon pales. Mikasa almost feels smug but keeps her stoic expression. He did not expect her to be here.

"Speak woman!" the judge snarls, shaking Annie out of her wayward senses. Mikasa watches the audience perceive the small woman in disgust. "What is it that you want to say to atone for your actions?"

"He...he..."

"He what?!"

Mikasa narrows her eyes at the potbellied man, cowering over Annie behind his podium. It is times like this that she finds herself reflecting over her burning hatred for men such as this one.

"I'm with child…"

"We know you are with child! Now tell us what you came here to say!"

"He's-"

"Now be careful. Your lies will not be accepted." Mikasa frowns. "We all know that Lieutenant Mewinsky isn't the father of your child. If that was what you wanted to say then there is no need for us to prolong the trial."

"I did not…I did not kill him on purpose," Annie says quietly.

Mikasa stands.

She ignores the people who notice her, and is relieved to see that Levi did not react. His arms folded, he continues looking off into space.

Mikasa knows the story, and she knows that whatever Annie said to the court is the absolute truth. She knew that the man Annie killed was the one responsible for Annie's forced pregnancy.

Still, Mikasa chooses not to care for it all. She didn't even know why she ever agreed to come here.

She thinks of the last time she saw Armin and Eren before they died. In a small bedroom, they all said their last goodbyes with long felt hugs before they rushed into battle.

Armin whispered his last request to Mikasa then. "Please Mikasa. Whatever you do, watch over her for me."

Mikasa never responded. She had watched Armin leave with Eren, never acknowledging that she heard what he said. _Please watch over her for me. _

"What is it, Corporal?" the judge asks.

"I think we shouldn't dismiss what she's saying."

"She has no evidence to prove that she was forced," the judge patiently responds as though he is speaking to a little girl.

He continues. "There is a witness who saw the incident. Ms. Leonhardt was never forced into sexual intercourse and had no reason to murder Lieutenant Mewinsky."

"I don't think that we should rely on what one witness said. There are other ways to-"

"Corporal. We all admire your extraordinary skills. By no means are we dismissing your words, but you have to understand that the law is the law, and Ms. Leonhardt still has to pay for her actions."

"So you are admitting that she may have been raped."

At this, Levi's gaze flickers towards her. Mikasa feels the burn of his gaze. She is aware of his message. _I hope you know what you're doing. _

The judge did not speak. He simply turns to the man with eyes like Eren's.

"You were the first witness, yes?"

The man no longer holds a bored look. His eyes widens as he continues staring at Mikasa.

"Where you not?!"

"Y-yes, your honor."

"Now tell us what happened three months ago on January 25th."

The man stands slowly, fully aware that everyone in the courtroom is staring at him, their eyes filled with a gleaming hope that whatever he says next will be the same thing he said those months ago.

"Well, I heard a scream."

"Whose screams?"

"Lieutenant Mewinsky."

"Lieutenant Mewinsky can scream," the judge mused, but his drop in sarcasm did not rouse any laughter. "How did he scream, Mr. Kells?"

"I-I-"

"Did he scream like a woman?"

A pause. Mikasa stares at the man who notices her cold gaze.

"Y-yes."

"Did you see him doing the screaming?"

"No, I was outside in the shed."

"You did not see whatever happened inside."

"No."

"What words did you hear?"

The soldier pauses, hands in fists and shaking. Sweat forms over his brows. Mikasa sighs to herself. Of course he had been lying. As the man begins to stutter, she lets her gaze look down at the tiny blonde. Annie still did not look in her direction. Not since Mikasa came back to Shiganshina District.

"I heard him saying please. Please don't hurt me."

"You heard him say please," the judge repeats. "What else happened?"

The man's soul is wide open for Mikasa to peruse. He knows that if one lie came out of his mouth in this courtroom, Mikasa will make his life on the Survey Corps a living hell.

"I-I don't know," the man stutters.

"Oh? Did you not tell us that he was dragged outside and stabbed in front of you?"

"Yes. That's what happened!"

"Then why did you say that you did not know?" the judge asks, gritting his teeth. "Tell us what you said!"

"There's no need," Levi calls out.

The jury and audience erupts in quiet murmurs and whispers. The soldier did not say anything else. It is evident that he forgot what he said those three months ago.

"Give us Ms. Leonhardt. There's no need for a trial."

"But she must pay for her actions!"

"She should have done that through the death penalty." Levi said. "But according to the law, slavery seemed more fitting at the time. Ms. Leonhardt's been with the Lieutenant since the crystal broke and it is obvious that her time spent with him wasn't the most pleasant. Since this district has grown tired of her presence, the Survey Corps can relieve you of her once you give her to us."

"She still belongs to the Mewinsky family-"

"No she does not. Not anymore. Lieutenant Mewinsky is dead, and has no family members other than the child Ms. Leonhardt carries."

A bout of silence echoes in the courtroom. The old man frowns, his fingers tapping over the podium. Mikasa knows that they will not harm Annie. After all, there is no need.

Annie would be a property of the remaining Survey Corps members. Right under the wing of Commander Levi, the leader of the four soldiers she murdered.

…


	2. II

**The Trouble with Hope**

* * *

It is obvious that the Commander does not know what to do with Annie.

The solution is to keep Annie around for as long as it takes. Killing her is no longer an option. Killing her will solve nothing. Annie is a spoil of war, a piece of garbage neither Corporal nor Commander could get rid of.

Mikasa wipes her blades with a dry towel, assuring that every dust or stain is not left behind. Sitting on a slab of rock, she then swipes the blades against granite, watching the tip of the blade gleam under the moonlight. She knows she does not need to do this, but she's done it since she was a young teen, and it was difficult to break this habit. Especially in this new world.

The fireplace in front of her glares an orange hue, mingling with dark indigo skies above. A gentle breeze brushes past her. For the first time, soldiers are sitting on a landscape freely, unafraid of what might come out of the woods. After all, there are no more Titans. There is no need to fear anymore. The world is theirs to roam, and Mikasa loves it. She only wishes that Armin and Eren were hear to enjoy it.

Annie is the obvious oddball out. She is not wearing Survey Corps uniform like the rest. She is in a cleaner version of the peasant dress she wore in court. Her hands and feet are not bound, since there is no home to run to.

Mikasa just had the pleasure of telling her that her hometown is a barren wasteland. "Who knows?' Mikasa had said while Annie listened in the dungeons. "We might even turn it into a tourist town. That way you can visit it all you want." Not once did Annie respond to any of her comments or look her in the eyes.

Annie sits by herself, her piercing blue yes fixated on the front of her lap. At times, she talks to herself now and then, but her words have progressed into unintelligible phrases. The ring she used to turn in a Titan is nowhere to be found. But even if Annie had the ring, Mikasa knew that she could not transform.

Annie's powers were no more. It seemed that in exchange for the crystal's protection, her Titan prowess disappeared,

Mikasa remembers the last time she saw Annie just months after the crystal suddenly broke. She was eighteen then, with no idea of her place in a world without Eren and Armin. Broken by war like many others, she was the only one who hesitated on what to do with Annie. Armin had already cursed her with paralysis.

Mikasa had watched Annie stand strong in front of millions, waiting for the death penalty to be passed. Annie looked just as she did before she crystallized herself. Annie looked prepared to walk the guillotine. Valiant and filled with a sickening sense of honor over her actions.

Then Mikasa left before the trial ended.

Jean was the one who told her of the sudden change of events. Annie would no longer face the death penalty, but survive under Lieutenant Mewinsky's mercy.

"I don't know. It's just wrong," Jena had told her that day.

"You can't blame the people. They just think that death will set her free," Mikasa responded automatically.

"But Mikasa...I just think it's not the only way. What's the point of enslaving her? Why have her trapped with a man twice her age? Don't you think this is wrong Mikasa? Isn't this idea of punishment a little too fucked up?"

Mikasa had not responded immediately. In fact, she had left Jean waiting, sitting on the other side of the table in the pub near the walls of the newly established Wall Maria. Armin's last words haunted her. _Protect her for me, Mikasa. Whatever you do. Protect her for me. _

"Have you eaten?" Mikasa asks suddenly over the fire. The petite blonde does not say anything. She is looking at the palm of her hands. Mikasa continues smoothing her blades against stone.

Annie is a pitiful sight. Her fair brows furrow as she whispers something to her hands. By now, the remaining five soldiers surrounding the fire place notice the exchange. Florence Vonnegut, a rookie, clutches the front of her uniform. Mikasa puts her blades down.

She walks over to one of the cargo carts to take out a small pouch of mixed berries. The cook preparing porridge a few feet away for another group of soldiers gives a full bowl of porridge to the Corporal.

As Mikasa lays the porridge the ground in front of Annie, she realizes how much the woman has changed.

Annie is truly unrecognizable.

Her nose is over sized compared to the rest of her features. Her eyes droop, with large dark bags bracing them. Her skin is a pasty white, slicked with sweat and slight blotches. Her lips take on a bluish tint. She crouches over slightly, as though her stomach was hurting. She does not look at Mikasa. Her piercing eyes are wide, pinned over her hands.

The familiar burning of hate no longer runs through Mikasa's veins. Mikasa feels no need to kill this stranger. She does not know who this stranger is. Mikasa realizes that she never carried a spoon. Luckily, a soldier rushes in to hand her one.

"Thank you," Mikasa says.

The girl smiles and skips away.

When Mikasa turns, she is staring straight into Annie's eyes.

Annie does not look like she recognizes Mikasa. Mikasa dips the spoon into the porridge. She scoops out a spoonful and offers it to the blond.

Annie eats without complaint.

* * *

Commander Levi narrates her background for Mikasa. He had called upon the Corporal early in the morning to come to his office.

Mikasa knows what he wants. Just as Armin did. "What's the point of this all? Keeping her around?" she asks.

"I ask myself that all the time." Levi said. "As much as I miss my team, I cannot bring myself to do anything rash. It's been a long time after all. We've gotten over those deaths. Killing her would be meaningless."

"…are you planning on letting her go?"

Levi pauses, beginning to tap his pencil on his desk. "That's something I've been considering. This place isn't good for her, and her pregnancy was a result of that. But her homeland is no more, waiting to be settled by people looking to explore this new world. Do you understand Mikasa?"

She did not speak, but Levi continues his gentle tirade. "Only you can watch over her for now. I'm not sure how long, but you are the only person I can trust."

"I don't think I can do that Commander."

Levi reaches over his desk for a set of documents. Mikasa sees two spots of his hands, spots where his two fingers used to be. To have Levi survive this far with a tiny scratch is an accomplishment that inspired many others to join the new Survey Corps, in hopes of continuing its legacy. There are no more Titans to kill, but there are places left unseen, new explorations to make. The Survey Crops had to assure that no other threats existed.

Levi takes out a thick leather bound file, slapping it over his desk. Mikasa watches as he opens it, taking out several yellowed parchments with dark handwriting.

"These are the several complaints made about Lieutenant Mewinsky." Levi announces. "And this is before he took Annie under his wing."

"He was a Survey Corps member?"

"Yes, before he signed up for the Military Police." Levi says. "But he did not make this transition on his own. Commander Erwin once worked on his squad."

The thought of the dead former commander's name peaks Mikasa's interest. Flashing across her memory, she envisions the last time Erwin spoke to her. _You are an excellent soldier, _he had said. Mikasa is almost glad that she never saw him be devoured by a titan.

"This was during Mewinsky's fifth year, and several women complained of him," Levi states, taking out a small slip of paper. "This is by a Garrison, who reported that Mewinsky had assaulted her in an alley."

Another slips of paper.

"A Survey Corps rookie, Samantha Wen. Reported sexual harassment."

Another.

"Survey Corps member. Apparently, Mewinsky assaulted her in the dungeons."

Another.

"A Garrison. Reported groppin-"

"Did the law know about this?" Mikasa asks. Levi stops. "I mean. Did they know that he was like this? Did they do a background check on him? "

Levi does not respond, regarding Mikasa's astonished expression.

"This is what happens when the culprit hails from a rich family. The Mewinskys were ones who invested in the building of Wall Sina, so they go way back. He was the only heir left. The law wouldn't touch him. In the end, he had power over the others in the military. Which means, that he had enough money to bribe the court into giving him Annie Leonhardt."

Mikasa is at a loss when Levi closes the file and takes out another, yet slender one.

"These are complaints made by neighbors who lived alongside Mewinsky. When Annie Leonhardt lived with him," Levi says. "Unfortunately, these were dismissed by the court around the time of the trial."

He takes out a roll of parchment.

"This complaint was made my Mr. Aden before the time of his death three years ago. He reported that he suspected Lieutenant Mewinsky for an abuse of some kind. He made seven more reports before he stopped. I wouldn't be surprised if a caretaker had advised him to stop."

Another slip.

"This next report is by a leather merchantman, who reported seeing the Lieutenant in the act of assaulting Ms. Leonhardt and commanded that the police take her out of his custody. There are many others who complained, and mind you, it was such a hassle to get a hold of their reports. I wouldn't be surprised if anyone would want to erase these."

* * *

Mikasa sees Annie sitting by herself the next week, munching on an apple.

She refuses to let the unfamiliar ache in her chest pain her. Mikasa does everything to not see the hell Annie faced in that man's household. She tries not to picture her isolation, being the only one of her kind left in this world, and without her special abilities. Mikasa tries not to put herself in Annie's shoes, and feel the humiliation of being a sex toy for a fiend.

Annie is alone on the other side of the training grounds, watching some of the rookies train. Florence Vonnegut at one point comes to sit near the petite blonde. The ginger haired rookie does not say anything, but merely keeps her shoulders near Annie's. Mikasa can tell that the others frown upon this, but she silently commends Ms. Vonnegut for her bravery and sheer stupidity.

The Survey Corp medic reported earlier that Annie is near the end of her first trimester and shows no signs of requesting an abortion. "I doubt it's because she cares for the baby. She probably doesn't trust me to keep her alive," he had concluded.

In other words, Annie sees two options. Be killed or be killed. For some reason, she still feared death.

Mikasa watches Annie chew the apple slowly, as though this might be the only meal she ends up getting in the day. Vonnegut sees Mikasa mid duel with another comrade, earning her a punch in the face. Figures.

Mikasa feels a burning need to ask Annie if she ate.

_Annie, are you hungry? Do you want more food?_

_Do you need some water? Tea?_

.

.

.

_Annie, why did you kill Gunther?_

_Why did you help Reiner and Berthold invade Wall Maria?_

_Why did you think we all needed to die?_

_Why did you kill all those people, Annie?_

_Petra._

_Eld. _

_Oluo._

_Karla! It's your fault Eren had to live without a mom!_

_Everyone! _

_Why did you do it?! _

Mikasa clenches her fists, not knowing how long she stood there, watching Annie painstakingly eat her apple. The apple is almost finished, but Annie continues eating the small bits of morsel near its center. Mikasa sees that she does this slowly. Mikasa does not know why, but this scene is most heart wrenching.

Mikasa walks away, ignoring the looks from the trainees. Annie still eats her apple.

* * *

**Rachel** - Thanks so much for your review! I really appreciate it!


	3. III

_I don't own them_

* * *

**The Trouble with Hope**

In the pitch black surroundings of her room, Mikasa is only aware of soft peachy skin and rose wet lips, coupled with dizzying sighs and strained moans. She's drunk. She knows this. But given her acute sharp senses, she could tell what time it is, how she got to this place and who this girl in her bed was.

She could trace every moment up until this event in her mind. She went to the pub like she does every night. It is after Jean leaves her to drink by herself that she spots the girl she is sleeping with. The girl approached her with her hands clasped behind her back, looking like any respectable maiden would. But Mikasa knows this girl very well. This girl is a soldier, but is front below the ranks. She is blonde, with blue eyes and an awkward smile.

Her lithe form is that of the nymph Mikasa reads about in old aged books from Wall Sina's great library. It is toned and pale under the daylight, but agile an in the dark.

She has been watching this girl for some time now, but didn't think their first conversation would end up like this. The girl's name is indiscernible, but the Corporal knows people who know her. Her names falls under the lines of Doris or something else. She knows that it is short and sweet, but still can't put her finger on it.

She buys the girl a ruby necklace to wear without any clothing on as she kisses the apex of her thighs. Mikasa lazily flicks her tongue over the girl's nub, drunken under a cloud of ale. She fingers 'Doris' slowly, ignoring the tug over her hair and the girl's heightened cries. Mikasa tries not to think too much about the hand on her hair, but it irritates her at some point.

So Mikasa slaps the hand away. She doesn't know why she does that, but she feels much better when the girl keeps her hands to herself and lets her sounds die down. The undeniable truth seeps in, and she knows that the girl wants to leave right after they finish.

Mikasa doesn't care though. She should, but she just doesn't give a fuck. She has the girl on her back, her slightly calloused hands pressed under the Doris's knees. Her chest is flushed against the other's, and the warm tingling friction of her thigh between the girl's legs is mind numbing. There is nothing about this union that is like the romances she hears about. This girl is nothing to her but someone she happened to be interested in. She is a stranger whose use will soon go away.

The corporal has Doris on her side, her knees and revels in her sobbing mans. She doesn't let Doris return the favor, but hotly whispers in her ear to stay still as she rocks her hips over her thigh, riding herself furiously into completion. She shares a chaste kiss with Doris, who is as unenthusiastic about it as she is.

When they are done, the girl tries to kiss her again before she leaves, but Mikasa turns her head before she does.

"Are you alright, Corporal?" she asks, the hurt over her face hidden in the dark. Mikasa is glad that she does not notice. Mikasa places her hands behind her neck, wishing she had another drink.

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

* * *

Annie's belly magically swells over the short months that come along. The more Mikasa sees her, the more she grows irritated. Annie no longer has that wayward air about her. She now stays quiet, and keeps to herself in secluded areas.

Florence Vonnegut has gained a bad reputation among her peers because of her newfound friendship with the former terrorist. She is the only one that cares to sit next to Annie in the dining hall. Whether she speaks to her or not is uncertain. Annie rarely speaks, not caring to even say 'yes' or 'no. She makes herself unnoticeable, which has helped in veering off any troublemakers. Nevertheless, no soldier in the Survey Corps wouldn't dare do it. At one point,

Mikasa hears a rumor of a veteran soldier attempting to force Florence Vonnegut to resign. Still, she ignores them all because thinking of them would make her think of Annie. Thinking of Annie means thinking of her ever decreasing pay. Thinking of Annie means thinking of Levi, who is still pressuring her to keep Annie under her wing.

"How have you been?" Levi asks her one night when he calls her to his office for the umpteenth time. Mikasa notices the dark bags underneath his eyes and the way his fingers fiddle each other. Levi isn't this nervous usually, but she could understand why he would be now.

For three months, her pay took a downhill. Survey Corps members are resigning at a fast rate. Funds were running low, halting several renovation projects. Mounds of work are piled on top of Levi, including deciding the fate of an ex-terrorist.

"I've said this before, Corporal. I do not think I am fit to take care of Annie Leonhardt." she says again, glaring at the shorter man.

"It isn't a matter of whether you can or can't anymore."

Mikasa blinks rapidly. "I don't understand."

"As your commander, Annie will be under your care."

"You were the one who wanted her under your ownership. I didn't jump straight to a conclusion when we were in court. I merely expressed my opinion, and you assume that taking Annie would solve everything."

"I see." Levi responds.

Mikasa squirms in her seat, feeling a strange weight on her shoulders. She is annoyed that her commander is still going to try to have his way, regardless of the fact that she is in no condition to care for a woman with child.

She is close to broke despite the fact that she's saved enough money to last her two years on her own. If Annie and her child were to come in the picture, she will have enough to last her six months. She is not ready to tolerate such changes.

"I have a proposition for you," Levi says. "Take Ms. Leonhardt under your care and you will have more than your savings."

He takes out what looks like a sort of contract from his desk drawer. "You are Humanity's World's Second Strongest. The government sees you as highly valuable and will do their best to assure that you are well taken care of for the rest of your life."

"Under the condition that I take Annie Leonhardt under my care," Mikasa finishes, her fists clenched tightly over her lap.

Levi does not say anything. He simply stares at her, his features impassive, ready for her to retaliate in any way. Mikasa knows that she will gain nothing from throwing his cup of coffee in his face. She makes the most rational decision. She swift takes his keys without him noticing, gets up, leaves his office, locks him in and then throws the keys far away into a place she doubted the sharpest eye could find.

* * *

A month later, Annie is waiting for her by the time the members of the Survey Corps are gone. Only the veterans are left. Annie is seated in the dining hall. The dining hall echoes with Mikasa's steps, illuminated by a few torchlights. Mikasa sent her luggage to an inn a while ago, anticipating the time she would need to resign.

Annie is now six months pregnant.

And from this moment, watching Annie by herself, waiting for her to give her the signal to take her bags and follow her, Mikasa sees it all become a blur. A faded array of multiple colors and masses Mikasa could not decipher. One minute, she is leaving the post she has trained years for with a pregnant woman beside her, and the next, she is reading a three days old newspaper on the busiest streets of Shinganshina, two months out of work.

Mikasa does not need to work a day in her life anymore, but in the deepest part of her mind, there is need to do more than just sharpen blades every early morning.

On the lowest foot of the hill, Mikasa watches the home she returned to. Eren's old home, renovated under the government's hands. The house looks just like the house she remembers. Mikasa almost expects Mrs. Yeager to come out, toss her a wide smile and usher her in for a steaming pot of stew and toasted bread.

But Mrs. Yeager is not in this house, neither is Mr. Yeager. Eren is not there, waiting for her aid to beat down Armin's latest bullies down the street. Armin is not there, sitting on the porch with Eren with a big encyclopedia in his hands. No one is there. The only person in that house is a heavily pregnant slave with no intentions of lying down in bed. At this time of the day, Annie would be cooking her dinner.

Mikasa grudgingly enters her home. Opening the door, she delves into a heavenly realm of sausages and vegetables, mingled with an unfamiliar mystery side dish. This is what she does when she arrives home: she goes up the stairs to her room, ignoring Annie's small form in the kitchen. Annie does not ever look in her direction. Mikasa then freshens up, dons on a comfortable tunic and pants. She goes back downstairs and ventures into the kitchen to find her meal nicely covered on the dining table.

At this time, Annie is nowhere to be found, but Mikasa can hear her utensils clinking with her plate outside on the front porch. Sometimes, she doesn't hear it at all, which means that Annie would go to by the shed to eat.

Mikasa would finish her plate, wash the remaining dishes and go back to bed, not caring whether or not Annie came back in the house.

On this particular night, Mikasa does not do this.

The strain of not finding a job and feeling useless gets to her. She begins to think of all the other things she has had a luxury to forget when she is deep at work. Now, work is no longer there to distract her.

It occurs to her that she has been living in the only other home she's ever known for a month, living with a slave due anytime soon. It dawns on her that Annie is seven months pregnant, and has not rested since the day she moved into this home.

Annie feels that urge Mikasa feels. She feels like she is wasting away by resting, so she tries to make herself worthy by cooking Mikasa's food and cleaning after her whenever she left the house to do whatever she did.

Annie is washing the remaining dishes in the sink. Her whited blouse over a long burgundy skirt is too loose around her frail shoulders. Her skirt is dragging on the floor. Annie never cuts her hair and keeps it in a messy low tail. The blonde of her hair is still the same light shade it had been. Mikasa stands still on the spot between the kitchen and sitting area, gazing at the way it glints in the dim light of the kitchen.

Annie's shoulders tense up.

"Would you like for me to help?" Mikasa asks.

She is standing in the middle of the kitchen, amidst flowing water and sweltering heat. Annie slowly turns. As the sun hits the side of her face, Mikasa realizes just how much Annie has changed. The blonde looks confused for a moment, so Mikasa asks to help her with the dishes again.

Annie looks at the dishes. They are still piled high atop the basin. It will take her long to finish washing them. Mikasa knows that she does not feel comfortable with this new arrangement. But Mikasa does not care. She has nothing better to do.

"Alright."

And there it is. Annie's normal voice and not the voice of a lunatic. Annie's voice is the voice of the old Annie she knew, but it is much tired and hoarse. Mikasa forces herself to evade the acute feeling of ice water splashed over her face. _Annie. _She sighs, rolls up the bottom of her sleeve and ambles over to Annie's side.

Annie is like a glimpse of fresh air. Mikasa takes in another deep breath of strange flowers she doesn't remember being around this home. They are good smelling flowers. Almost like the dandelions lines up over the meadows outside of Shinganshina.

They wash the dishes together. In the corner of her eye, Mikasa notes the roundness of Annie's belly. It is too large to be considered normal. Annie's small frame couldn't possibly handle it, but it did. Annie did not seem to notice that she is carrying a ton of weight in front of her. For almost an hour, they rinse pots and pans before spending the next thirty minutes to wipe them clean.

Mikasa wants to say something, but nothing pops up in her mind. When the wiping is done, she cannot help but stay seated by the dining table. She is useless while seeing Annie prepare dinner. By the time dinner is finished, Mikasa still sits quietly as Annie serves the food.

Annie only serves her plate.

"Why don't you eat here?"

Mikasa regrets having that her first words since she asked Annie to help her with the dishes. A chill settles inside. She gazes at her plate of sausage and stewed vegetables, not wanting to look into Annie's eyes.

"It's not allowed."

Mikasa looks up. Annie's dull blue eyes are wide. "What?"

"I can't sit near you."

"I don't understand."

Mikasa watches the skies dim a brunt orange as the sun sets. Annie's face is almost dark, and Mikasa strains her eyes to see the myriad of expressions there.

"Aren't you supposed to have me sit outside?" Annie asks, brows furrowing. "He says that I'm always supposed to be outside. I couldn't sit with him."

Something shifts. Mikasa never responds. She lets Annie's words sink in. _Him. _"He never let you sit near him during his meals?"

"Yes."

"Where did he make you sit?"

Annie blinks. "Outside."

"Where?"

"…the stable."

Mikasa feels a sharpening in the pit of her chest. She does not know why, but she just feels it. The scent of the food is now nauseating. "Where there other places where he did not let you sit?"

The question is simple, but Annie treats it as though it were complex. Mikasa witnesses the agony drawn over Annie's' face. Mikasa's words are molten heat over Annie's already scarred skin. Mikasa sees it all. Annie has been asleep all this time, and is now awakening to the horrors of what happened to her.

"Annie?"

Mikasa rises as Annie's body begins to shudder and her face crumples. Through instinct, she catches Annie before she sinks to the floor. Mikasa hushes for Annie to calm down as she sobs soundlessly in her arms. Annie's arms are frail and she is almost weightless in her arms. Mikasa tightens the hold over her, her lips pressed over the top of her fair hair as the first sob escapes her lips.

It reminds her of her own mother crying when she was very young. Her father was missing for a week, and the officials were strangely careless about his whereabouts. Mikasa knew that her father did not make a lot of friends when he was younger, and sometimes, his past made them move around several times to places that were usually isolated from the city.

"It's alright." Mikasa says, rocking Annie back and forth. "It's okay to cry sometimes."

_It's okay to kill too. _

_Remember how you killed them all, Annie?_

_How don't you think you deserve-_

Mikasa shuts her eyes and kisses Annie's forehead.

"It's okay."

* * *

**TillThatTime** - Wow. Your comment was so great to read. I'm so glad that you found interest in this. Thank you so much for your opinion. And yeah, I'll definitely change it.

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	4. IV

**The Trouble with Hope**

* * *

"I'm getting married."

Jean's announcement does not jolt Mikasa. She expected for something like this to happen since Jean resigned from the Survey Corps. He has been living with Sasha since he left, taking up his hobby in drawing. Jean now produces art work of several portraits of veteran soldiers who passed on during the era of Titans. Several of Wall Sina's top art curators have come to his studio to collect these pieces to sell at high rates. To them, it is a great way to make a fortune, but to Jean, it is a chance to not forget those who made this world without Titans.

Most times they spent in the pub, Jean would have his sketchbook in hand, drawing various expressions of Mikasa. Up till now, he still had yet to show her a drawing. Mikasa watches him half buried in his work. The shadow of his beard is amusing. Mikasa sometimes has a hard time trying to recognize Jean whenever he was in a group of men, but all the same, Jean's intense facial features always sets him apart.

Mikasa smiles as Jean continues to draw in his sketchbook, his brows in a deep furrow. He leans back in his seat, his one leg thrown over the edge of their table. The bartenders are used to his presence. If Mikasa isn't around, Jean would be here, drawing gestures of the pub's attendants. "You don't seem too fond of it."

"Nah. That's not it," Jean says, now lifting his head to look into Mikasa's eyes. "Everything's moving so fast. I didn't think that I could live this long."

Mikasa knows what he means. She isn't surprised when he says the next words. "Sometimes, I don't think I deserve it. Being here, alive and having the time of my life."

In the beginning, Mikasa would never take another look at Jean during their time in the 104th Trainees Squad. But after Eren and Armin's death, Jean has been the pillar she never thought she'd lean on. When he offered to be there for her, in her vacant bedroom within the Survey Headquarters, Mikasa found herself accepting his offer without any other thought. She was lost, heartbroken and on the brink of suicide. But Jean taught her that there were other thing she could live for.

"By the way, I have something." He flips the pages in his book, stopping right in the middle. He turns the book over and braces the bindings over his hands. He tilts it for Mikasa to see the rough draft of another drawing. "Looking good huh?"

Mikasa's chest melts. She half laughs and half scoffs at the drawing of all of the 104th Trainees Squad. The first thing she notices is Marco Bott, grinning near a scowling Jean. Thomas Wagner's features are for the most part, accurate, including his charming smile. Mikasa's hands are trembling when touching the drawing. She sees the men she has missed all these years.

"I hope I got them right."

She smiled, "Yes, you did."

Eren's passionate look is the same as the one she remembers vividly. The boy staring back at her through the drawing watches her quietly with a small rare smile. Next to him, stood Armin, tossing her a warm grin. Mikasa sees herself next the other boys. The three of them together somewhat makes the drawing complete. All of the soldiers together makes everything right.

"You've been practicing."

"Of course. Got nothing else to do," Jean says.

Looking back at the drawing, she lets her gaze stop over Mina Carolina. The lines used by Jean to make her come alive are soft and wispy. It is almost as if she is moving in it. But this isn't the only reason Mikasa pays attention to the drawing.

It isn't that Reiner and Berthold happened to be in it, with the taller one's face stoic while the other cares enough to smile mischievously. It is the girl near Mina that catches Mikasa's attention.

The petite soldier is in her standard Garrison uniform, her hoodie setting her apart from the others.

"Lots of people aren't gonna like this because they're in there," Jean says. "But who cares. I liked all of them with us. I feel like we were a team back then."

The person with her arms around Mina's shoulders is none other than Annie Leonhardt.

Annie's face is unlike the one she sees today. She doubts that Annie is much happier in this drawing than she is now. But Annie seems calmer in this drawing.

"How is she?" Jean asks.

Mikasa pushes the drawing towards him. He takes it, closes it and puts it in his duffel bag. "I don't know."

"That bad, huh?"

"She's not the same as she was," Mikasa says with a frown over her face. "I really don't know what to say about her."

"People are talking."

Mikasa narrows her eyes. "There is nothing for them to talk about. I'd rather not discuss this while I'm trying to spend some time with you, Jean. I'm aware that I'm being watched. This is probably why I still can't find a job."

Jean keeps his next words to himself. She is surprised when he completely pushes their early discussion aside moments later, switching to a different topic.

"Maybe you need to do something with blades."

"What?"

"I don't know. You're always cleaning your damn blades. You're smart, Mikasa. You have a sharp head. Find a skill and work from there."

"But killing titans is the only thing I've ever done," Mikasa states.

Jean nods with a thoughtful look. "How many times have you kept a straight face and bandaged up everyone who lost a limb, helped the dying soldier pass on or cut the nape of a titan's neck with a lot of thought?"

Mikasa did not speak. She tilts her head. "Other soldiers die because when they go kill titans, they only think about survival. But you're one of those people who thinks about how to kill them. You map out stuff and follow through. You're very analytical about certain situations."

She never thinks about it. Having Jean telling her was lighting up something she never thought was there. "But any ways. That's just what I can tell you. Since I'm getting married, we have to start finding a more family-friendly pub."

Outside, Mikasa gives Jeans a smile, forgetting about his earlier words.

* * *

Mikasa's profile is as the same as she kept it since the early morning, just when the sun had yet to rise. She recites a poem in her head, not remembering the title of it. As the smell of herbal ointment grows stronger, paving way for silent murmurs in the bedroom she is in, Mikasa tries to recall anything about the poem that could help her with remembering its title, but nothing comes up. What insistently rattles the foggiest part of her mind is the face of Annie Leonhardt, contorted as she releases a terrifying scream.

From the account of her Commander, Viktor Mewinsky is what Levi calls 'a sorry mistake for a human being'. In short words, Mewinsky was unstable and on the brink of madness. Mikasa has seen him before, right at Annie's trial. At first glance, the man is an imposing figure. Old and hair grayed at his sideburns, his empty grayish eyes were enough to put her on edge.

The man seems harmless at first sight. He appeared to be the type of man used to bragging and not having the physical will to prove for his words, but Levi grudgingly admitted that he was a strong fellow. After all, he lived long enough.

He had dark curly hair with strong jaws. The scowl over his mouth was too pronounced for Mikasa. Over the side of his face lied a jagged scar.

"How did he get it?" Mikasa asked Levi one night over cups of tea. Levi stares at her gravely and says, "He got it in a brawl. He was drunk. There's nothing meaningful about his scar. If it did had any meaning, it would be that he was an idiot."

Mikasa had kept quiet then. "I know. I ask myself the same thing." Levi says, as though he knew her thoughts. He knew what she wanted to ask, and he finished it for her. "It's a shame isn't it? How could a bastard like him break a titan like her?"

Annie is laying on her bed as the Survey Corps medic prods at her lower belly. There is a calm expression about her face as she stares at the ceiling. The medic, James Stefanov, is gentle with his hands. No matter how much he tries to be gentle, Mikasa could tell that his very presence is irritating Annie. It is his hands. The hands are touching Annie's stomach too much.

"Nothing seems wrong." he announces hours later, sitting across as eerily silent Annie. "In about two weeks, you should be having your babies."

Mikasa's head tilts up just in time to see the sharp tilt of Annie's head. Annie blinks rapidly and says, "Babies? You said that I might be having a boy."

The medic tosses the blonde a warm grin. "It seemed to be that way in the beginning. But I guess things don't turn out the way we think it might."

Mikasa imagines Annie taking in the news with a sickening drop in the pit of her stomach. She pictures the blonde just as she does in her dreams.

She sees all the terrors in the grand mansion located in the mouth of Wall Sina, the terrors Levi describes with a muted look of pity.

Annie, having to come every night to the man's bedroom because she was instructed to be there. Annie listening to the tales of how her homeland burned to a desolate crisp, of how her father had been executed in front of all of Wall Maria's citizens, and of Reiner and Berthold, slaughtered in a frenzy of titans when a soldier pushed them over Wall Rose to their deaths. Annie having to listen to a man curse her for being herself, for being a titan shifter. For having an ability given to her since birth.

Annie, witnessing the man sink into a sudden bout of insanity and attempt to strangle her with his own bare hands while he violated her over his bed.

"No one knows why the man lost it," Levi explained.

"Maybe he was running out of money."

The commander had shaken his head, "No. He was trying to scare her."

Mikasa scoffs, "That's impossible."

"...try being a woman who lost her titan powers, her home and her identity. A woman who failed the only mission that defined her capabilities as a warrior. Someone who was useful. Try being a woman who had to fully depend on a man to give her food and shelter, knowing that one step out of his home would be her end. Either she would be killed by a commoner, die of starvation or adopt a life of prostitution under an alias."

When the doctor leaves, Mikasa does not know what to say to Annie. Since the time Annie broke down, Mikasa and she never dared talk to one another.

They kept their distance, pretending that what happened never did. Annie disappears into the kitchen and soon, Mikasa is sentenced to an hour listening to dishes clinking and water slushing. A part of her wants to say something to Annie, who is deep into her task, but the words never slip out.

In a week, they might be welcoming two human beings who might not be wanted in this world. Children who should be accepted, but face a life having to stay at home because it is too dangerous for them to play outside with friends or simply go to the market to buy candy.

"Do you want to go to the meadows?"

Slowly, water stops running. Dishes are set aside in quiet thuds. Mikasa could see Annie straightening her shoulders, before she turns around to look at Mikasa. Again, her gaze shows that she is taken aback and hesitant.

"What about the people?" Annie asks.

Mikasa shakes her head, "Don't worry about that. No one will touch you."

She then gets up and walks towards Annie, reaching for her with her hand. "It will be good for you...for us. I think it will be good for both of us."

Annie does not reach out to accept her hand. She continues staring at Mikasa in what is now complete mistrust. Mikasa understands. She takes her hand back, shoulders slumped.

"Annie, you are going to give birth next week," Mikasa says. "If you want your children to come safely, at least knowing that one person in this world will do anything to make sure they are cared for, the little you could do is come with me to the meadows and get things straight."

The blonde begins to shake her head.

"Don't you want them?" Mikasa asks, saddened by the change. The slope of Annie's shoulders, the glassiness her eyes are about to take.

"No. I don't want them," she says with a stoic expression, though tears fall freely down her face. "I don't want them. I never asked for them and I don't want them with me. I don't want them to be with me. I don't want them as my children."

"Do you hate them?" Mikasa asks.

Annie does not say anything. She looks away, gazing at the afternoon sun beaming down through foggy windows. The stiffness of her jaw is enough to tell Mikasa her piece of mind. No, Mikasa concludes, Annie does not hate these children.

"Come with me," Mikasa says and walks towards Annie to take her hand.

Annie pauses for a moment. As Mikasa gently pulls her away from the kitchen, she begins to follow suit.

* * *

Shinganshina District is a booming and frightening place when you are Mikasa Ackerman. But Mikasa Ackerman is not usually intimidated by lots of things, so the curious yet harsh gazes thrown her way don't do anything to make her uneasy. She knows these people and cares nothing for them. Her main purpose as of now, is to get Annie out to the meadows.

Annie is near her side as they make their way through the market square, taking in the busy streets, the many colorful merchandises and the thousands of people overcrowding the area. Sizzling kebab is grilled over a tray to her left. Raw linen line the racks of an elderly woman to her right. The grayish skies make her surroundings dreary, accompanied by the wary looks on the civilians' face.

Mikasa does not know what has gotten into her, but something propels her forward, tightly holding on to Annie's hand.

The gates out of Wall Maria are their silver lining. Mikasa does nothing but pulls Annie's shoulders towards her, putting her arms around them. Not once does she bother to look at the civilians who watch them, like animals waiting for a meal to be thrown across to them.

Annie's body is stiff, too stiff. Mikasa tightens her hold over them, driven by a need to whisper that everything will be alright.

The vanguards know who Mikasa is, so they give her a spiteful yet respectful salute. They do nothing for Annie, which is understandable, as much as Mikasa wants to hide her from all of it.

The air outside of Wall Maria seems different. To Mikasa, it is like taking a breath of fresh air. She feels Annie noticing the change with the ease of her shoulders

The meadows slope gracefully, like heavy ripples in a pond. The green grass flutters slowly as cool winds brush over them. The sloped tree in the middle of a patch of flowers are Mikasa's destination. She wants Annie to be here.

"What's this place?" Annie asks as they walking down a grassy hill.

"It has no name. But the boys and I used to come here...before Wall Maria fell and we had to retreat into Wall Rose."

Annie keeps quiet. Mikasa is too focused on her task to notice her choice of words. They reach the spot in a few minutes.

Mikasa lets go of Annie's hand.

"This is where Eren sat," Mikasa finds the trunk of the tree, pointing at the in dented part that formed a seat for Eren. She imagines Eren sitting there, playing with a blade of grass as he whines about how his mother always wants him to stay home and behave. "Most times, he spends the day here sleeping."

Annie says nothing.

Mikasa feels a sudden burn behind her eyes, but she wills it away. She points at the patch of grass near the indented seat. "This is Armin's spot whenever he came with us."

At the sound of Armin's name, Annie begins to put a hand over her stomach. In the corner of her eyes, Mikasa notices the strain of her neck. The memory of Armin begging her to do the unthinkable before his death flashes across her mind. Armin's war torn face is still kind and gentle, just like the face of the little boy who delved into the world expressed in his many books and encyclopedias.

_"Mikasa! Mikasa! Check this out!" _she remembered him saying one day during her first week living with Eren. After just an hour of meeting Armin, Armin had taken her in as a close friend. Mikasa had her scarf loose over her neck when he showed her drawn images of the sea and sand. _"See? Isn't it great!"_

_"Uh-huh,"_ Mikasa responded.

"Every day we'd come here just to sleep, eat and play," Mikasa says with a small laugh, envisioning three children play tag around the tree. A boy with brown hair and forest green eyes dashing across the fields, a blonde boy using the tree as his hiding place with a mischievous look over his blue eyes and a girl with a red scarf, her little face scrunched up in determination as she finds the blonde cowering behind the tree.

"It's not like that anymore, but I still come here even when they're no longer with me," she says again. "Coming here in the beginning was painful, but now it feels as though I have to do it every day. And it makes me happy. I feel them here whenever I come and I no longer feel sad whenever I come here by myself."

Mikasa is facing away from Annie now, her face ridden with tears. She wipes them away as they come. "I was never in the same situation as you were. My parents were killed in front of me by humans. Humans were the reason I learned that this world was a cruel place. But with Armin, Eren, Mrs. Yeager and Mr. Yeager, I found so much peace. And I cherished it."

She turns around in time to see Annie sit on Armin's patch of grass. Her back is turned toward her, but Mikasa knows that she is crying. She could not imagine the pain Annie went through, but Mikasa knows that if Eren hadn't come to her rescue, she would have been just like her, at the mercy of another human being.

"I am sorry that you had to go through something so horrible and downright wrong, Annie. I am so sorry that he had the audacity to tell you that it was the only way to atone for your actions," Mikasa says, fully turning around to walk towards Annie.

Her knees fall on the grass near Annie. With on small tug of the blonde's arm, the blonde turns to wrap her arms around Mikasa's neck.

Mikasa whispers in Annie's ear, "You have to welcome them. If your children are going to face a hard life, you have to at least give them your heart and remind them that they are worthy."

She feels a nod, and sees that her work is done.

She hears Annie say something. To the normal person, Annie would have to repeat what she said. But Mikasa is no normal person, and she knows what Annie just said.

"It's alright. We're past that now, don't you think?" Mikasa responds, sniffing as Annie's arms tighten their hold around her neck. She wants to stay like this for just hours longer. "I will help you take care of them in whatever way I can. Just tell me what to do, alright?"

Annie sniffs, "Thank you, Mikasa."

* * *

**Touzen** - Thank you so much for your input. It means alot!

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	5. V

**The Trouble with Hope**

* * *

Mikasa's dark hair almost obscures her face in a way that she despises. It is an instinct she cannot get rid of. In a fleeting second, she remembers Eren telling her when her hair grew too long. _It's like you have some hair growing gene, man! Cut it every day if you need too! _She smiles forlornly at the thought of him. The late night seems like a very early morning. Critters croak gently outside of her home, and its back dropped stillness soothes her.

She spent years waiting for the slightest sound, a brush of a footsteps of a titan in the early mornings when they awaken. To hear silence stay unbroken is a luxury she embraces, even if it is only for a little while.

Over the dining table before her are three opened anatomy books, lit up in a pale orange luminescent light near a melting candle. She is looking over a diagram of a pregnant woman's insides, inked exquisitely in fine detail. She attempts to memorize each part of the uterus, her heart beat quickening over the picture of a small baby nestled in his mother's womb.

She pays special attention to the female's vagina right atop the child's head. The tiny hole is the only way for the child to come out into the world, and the thought of Annie having to push out two children makes Mikasa nervous. _It'll be fine. Everything will be fine. _

She grabs her band from atop the table to tie her hair up, not caring how it looks. A gentle breeze caresses the nape of her neck from a slightly opened window. She looks at the staircase leading up to the top floor into three bedrooms. Mikasa's bedroom is the first right after the stairs, and it is now the current resting place of Annie, who is dead to the world at the moment.

The ex-corporal was a witness to a mother-to-be in a strange automatic state for the past three days. Mikasa had been out, looking through newspapers for job vacancies and going to every store possible in hopes of obtaining a position.

She even went to a butcher's shop, and was annoyed to have the manager lie about having already found an employee. So she left and came home, stunned to find the house immaculate to a degree she never thought possible. The wooden planks were practically gleaming in the hot afternoon. Plates, mugs, and utensils were cleaned and squeaked at the trace of her fingers.

The pictures of the Yeagers and Armin along with Mikasa's ten year old self bracing the living area were dusted off. Mikasa's room is the most different, with her mattresses cleaned and clothes folded neatly and hung in her closet. Blankets and sheets were freshly pressed and laid over the bed. The window was opened, and fresh new curtains swayed gently as the breeze brushed past them.

Mikasa was tired and fed up, but her day got better again, when she saw Annie Leonhardt snoring softly on her bed. The blonde was tired and still donned on her long peasant skirt, sandals, and a cotton blouse.

Mikasa had painstakingly removed those shoes and covered Annie with her blankets. She spent a few more minutes watching the blonde sleep. She had laid down next to her in the quietest way possible, staring at the way sleep made Annie seem much younger. She almost looked like a child.

So now she was here, spending the seventh hour reading old anatomy books Mr. Yeager kept stashed in the basement. She had nothing else to do today, so the first thing she did was go downstairs to explore. The books had been sealed and hidden underneath a dust ridden desk, piled up on top of each other when she found them.

After looking at the diagram, she moves onto the table of contents page, marveling over several cursive handwritten notes around them. Memories of Mr. Yeager holding her hand as they walk to their home brings a smile upon her face.

"Evening.

Mikasa blinks at the new voice. She does not flinch, but looks up slowly to see Annie sitting at the foot of the steps. Sleep still taunts her, but she gives Mikasa a gentle smile, saying these next few words: "I saw those books downstairs. Who were they for?"

"Eren's father." Mikasa smiles. "How are you?"

A flicker of a smile over Annie's tired leaves as soon as it comes up. "I'm alright. I'm just going to make something."

"I'll make you something."

"No its fine," Annie says airily. "It's just tea. I can't sleep because my back is killing me. And you've never cooked much."

Mikasa is sure that the wounded look on her face is the reason why Annie begins to laugh quietly. Annie gingerly lifts herself up, merely looking in Mikasa's direction as Mikasa stands to close her books for the night.

"You don't have to follow me."

"I will," Mikasa says stubbornly.

A slight tug deepens in Mikasa's chest as Annie leaves into the kitchen. The petite blonde is gorgeous under the candlelight, her expression indicating tiredness, though it is kind and gentle. The soft bags under her eyes are subtle, and not as harsh as the last time. The older Annie has a problem is her eyes being too sullen, almost to the point where it makes her look too lean, but Mikasa has gotten used to it. In a good way. "Is there anything you want me to do?"

Annie shakes her head, pulling out a mug form the cabinet.

"I'm alright." Annie responds, her voice heavier the more she speaks. There is a strange labored breathing behind each word. She takes a sip of the tea she prepares, blinking into Mikasa's direction. "You want some?"

Mikasa waits, listening to Annie's breathing. "Did you say that your back is hurting?"

"Yes."

"Why are you breathing like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like-"

Mikasa trails off, remembering something she read in another one of Mr. Yeagers textbook. It wasn't an anatomy book, but a manual on delivering a baby. _The warning signs that mother is probably in labor, is when she begins to experience severe cramping. _"Are you in pain?"

Annie blinks. "Um-"

"Your back."

"Oh. It's not as bad as before..."

Mikasa walks over to the blonde, unprepared for the waft of a sweet powdery scent come her way. She hesitantly reaches over, palming Annie's stomach. She doesn't know how this could help determine if Annie could possibly be in labor, but she tries anyway and immediately sees the difference.

Annie's stomach is tight and sloped downwards.

Mikasa hears Annie's breathing deepen. "Are you alright?"

Annie hesitantly shakes her head. "I don't think so."

Inside Mikasa's chest drops. "Ok. Come over here."

Annie takes Mikasa's hand. The women walk over to a small couch. Annie sits down, her hand never leaving the small of her back. A frown begins to settle on her face. Mikasa keeps Annie's hands in her own, waiting for the slightest reaction. "Do you feel it?"

Annie hisses and nods. "Yes."

* * *

At the crack of dawn, the early morning breeze is cool to her perspired skin. Mikasa did not expect to find herself running to every home in Shinganshina, only to be turned away at each attempt.

She is standing before her latest possible helper, who regards her with an unreadable look. "I cannot do that. I am not trained to deliver a child."

"But you don't need to deliver the child, I just need someone-"

"The answer is no."

The man's last words hold a troubling finality.

Mikasa is tired, her heart beat palpitating while she thinks of Annie back home. Mikasa has been walking around for three hours, in this small town, and up until now, no one is eager to help watch Annie while she went to search for Stefanov, not even the fucking vanguards.

The former Survey Corps medic is far away in Wall Rose, but close enough for her trip to last at least an hour.

She watches the man look around for a bit, before he steps down. The gap between them are a few inches, and with one glance, she knows that he does not like her. As his cold blue eyes regard her, she is acutely aware of time passing, and of the fact that she could have used to first hour to search for Stefanov herself. She is aware that she made a huge miscalculation by assuming that there was a soul in Shinganshina that was kind and forgiving.

"Listen ta me," he says. "I know who you are and I know yer got a titan in that house of yours. Do yerself a favor, and don't come back ter ask for help."

The door slamming shut forces Mikasa out of her reverie. She looks around her, noticing some of the lit homes she just knocked on. The civilians were watching her from their windows, faces solemn, as though their unwillingness to help a pregnant women was some sort of brave act.

* * *

The wind whips her face, and her hair almost obscures her vision, but Mikasa knows that they are irrelevant. She runs as fast as she can.

The sun begins to creep up, and her legs pick up. She took too damn long. Too long.

The house is partially opened when she comes home, intensifying her already errant fears. Mikasa's chest is hurting, pounding with an unspeakable force she couldn't fathom. Her throat is parched and her voice, unable to formulate any sound. She rushes into the living area, only to see that the couch Annie had been on was empty. "Annie!"

Annie is nowhere to be found.

The house is empty, and not a single room held her inside. "Annie!" she screams, running outside. There are a few civilians walking past, but all of them look away, not bothering to ask what was going on. Mikasa curses, rushing down the street. "Annie! Annie!" she yell again.

Eren and Armin's faces momentarily blink in her mind, and she seems them face a death she doesn't even know. She imagines them being crushed under the rubble Levi told her about, with their bodies unable to be recovered. She imagines Krista's body, half eaten over a battle field, her eyes wide and mouth opened. Ymir's haunted gaze as she jumps to her death in a mass of titans two days before the battle against titans was over. She vividly remembers Connie Springer's screams die out as a titan eats him in front of her, chewing him as it stares widely into her eyes.

Then she sees Annie in her mind, alone by herself as she slowly bleeds to death in the middle of the street while everyone else walk by, pretending that she did not exist. _Take care of her, Mikasa. Whatever happens, Please take care of her. ._

"ANNIE!"

Mikasa is now in the market square, screaming Annie's name over and over until her chest hurt too much. The civilians were still watching her as she falls on her knees, unwilling to lend a shoulder as she cries in panic. The vanguards were just there, arms folds and face frozen in scowls as they regard her. Not one looks troubled by the fact that someone is missing.

She has depended on Annie's existence to live. She has made Annie her vessel into the world, the only person that gave her any meaning in this current existence, no matter how small.

"Scuse me."

Mikasa doesn't hear the small voice at first, but when the little girl calls her again, she slowly looks up. The mousy haired child has a blank look over her face, with spectacles upheld by a worn cloth behind her head. Her clothes are appalling. With mismatched sandals, a dreary cardigan adorned the child. The grayed summer dress she wore inside is light enough for her to catch a cold. "Ms. Ack-man?"

_Ackerman. _"Yes?"

There is an intense look in their child's stare. "Ms. Annie's looking for you."

Mikasa is numb as the child tugs her hard enough for her to start moving. She finds it hard to move as the child leads the way. Her savior, in the tiny form of a little with the worst clothes one could ever give her, attempts to pull her into a conversation. "I thought it was gonna take long, but I heard your voice Ms. Ack-man!"

They walk down a quiet alley, entering the darker part of Shinganshina, the place were brothels populated. It is usually quiet around the day time, but in the night, it was as though the entire town existed there. The child babbles more, as though she is beginning to light up as they travel deep into the alley.

An opened gateway greets them.

At first, Mikasa thinks that it is just a pathway into a building, but she is appalling to see that only a small space awaits her.

Annie is inside, propped up on a cot with a few more children right at her side. She rushes inside, unaware of a blonde boy inching back enough for her to cradle Annie's head. Her heart drops at the bloody gash over her forehead. The blonde's breathing is hurried and labored. Her face is scrunched up in pain and her hands cradle her lower belly.

"Water came out." an older boy explains, his dark eyes fervently seeking Mikasa's own. Mikasa looks up at him, stricken at his intense stare. He almost reminds her of Eren.

"Thank you so much."

"S-okay. We'll help ya. Ms. Annie helps us all the time." he says, "My name's Greg. My sister is the one who brought her here. She's Mallorie." he points his chin at the bespectacled child who grins happily. "Is there anything you want us to do now?"

Mikasa nods, pressing her lips against Annie's forehead. "Can you help me take her back home?"

"Sure! She can come on our cart!"

Annie's eyes open slowly. Her hair slightly covers them, but Mikasa can see them, and they gleam happily as they watch her. "I'm sorry, Annie. I tried asking everyone."

She nods. "I know. I was worried. I'm sorry about leaving without telling you."

Mikasa shakes her head, her nose now pressed against Annie's. "It's fine. Come on. Let's go home." With a stronger resolve, she hooks her arms under Annie to lift her up. Strong arms are secured around her neck, and Mikasa can't help but momentarily kiss Annie's forehead as she walks out of the small area, followed by a small group of the bravest children she'd ever known.

* * *

A woman pulling a cart on her own with another inside along with a little boy and girl is a sight Shinganshina has never see before.

Annie's water had just broken a few minutes ago.

Mikasa doesn't care how many people see them, only that she needed to get Annie home. She had already sent another boy to Wall Rose with a hefty sum of money in order to call Stefanov and get him here as soon as possible.

Mallorie giggles along with her companion at Annie's soft murmurs in the cart. Mikasa doesn't know what they are talking about, but she is glad that they are distracting Annie.

"You're gonna have two babies?!" Mallorie suddenly says. "Oh that's gonna hurt real bad!"

* * *

As the sun fully ascends up within bright skies, Mikasa's demeanor shifts. She becomes much focused, her actions based solely on instinct and not logic.

She collects all of the blankets and towels in the house to put inside her bedroom. Sheets cleaned and cool, she puts more pillows under Annie, listening to the petite blonde's small requests.

Annie's back is hurting immensely and she asks for Mikasa to help her lay on her side, propped up by several clean pillows. She had helped Annie with a quick hot bath, quietly murmuring soothing words each time Annie released a small cry of pain.

The contractions were closing in, and Annie describes the pain as almost nauseating. It is a sharp back pain that starts at the base of her spine and travels all around her waist to her lower belly.

Mikasa's heart is pulsing fast, and it sends an uncomfortable tingle inside, coupled with the heat. She is upset, and Annie could tell. She is sure that Annie notices. She tries to hide the disappointment, and the pain of what happened earlier this morning, but it still ran through her mind. She still thinks that if this had gone on for longer, she probably would have seen Annie dead on the street.

The children are outside of her home playing, but their eyes and ears are sharp, and they are trained specifically by Mikasa to look out for one of their comrades and Stefanov. Annie's quiet moans morphs into loud groans. There is crying sometimes, but the most heart wrenching part is hearing her tremored words.

"I don't think I can do this."

"Yes you can. You'll be alright, Annie!" Mikasa says hurriedly.

Annie sobs, shaking her head. Tears run rampant down her cheeks, and her face is flushed red.

Mikasa removes the last of her clothing, a gathered flares skirt, and folds it to put over the nearest dresser. She rushes back to Annie's side, unaware of the fact that Annie is naked and she fully clothed. She then removes her beige tunic and pants, flipping off her shoes.

Mikasa says nothing. She only keeps her gaze on Annie's pained own. This feels so right for her. She slips her arm under Annie's head, and smiles as blue eyes close and a sigh emits Annie's lips. Their chests press together, and the warmth of it all calms Mikasa's quiet fury.

"It's alright, Mikasa." Annie murmurs.

"No. Please don't try to justify their actions for me." Mikasa says before she clasps her hands with Annie's own. "Never try to do that again! You're more worthy than they are and I don't care if this wall fell earlier. Maybe it should have-"

"Mikasa..."

"Please. I don't want to talk. Let's just get them here safely."

Chains clanging outside calm her as soon as they creep up. Someone came through the gates into the compound from the back of the house. Mallorie's hurried voice over a man's come up. Mikasa can hear Stefanov's frantic voice from outside, and knows that Annie is in good hands for now.

* * *

Mikasa has been a witness to the powerful shifts in time. The day when Wall Maria fell as the finality of Armin's words before it happened. When Wall Rose fell and was sealed back up, at the sudden ambush of titans killing people she just befriended.

In a world of titans, time was an unpredictable thing. You never knew what would happen, and was always constantly on edge. Time was still unpredictable, but Mikasa knew how to manage the odds. This time, she found herself in a peaceful place. Time shifted when she least expected it, but she is now the happiest person in the world.

The first boy comes out in the late afternoon, face scrunched up as he is placed over his mother's chest. The tension in the room eased with his first cries. Annie sobs like no other, face drenched in sweat and body weak with exhaustion. The first boy's screeches are loud and reverberate through the walls, but Mikasa doesn't care.

The latter comes minutes later, and he is more silent. He only whimpers and Stefanov is especially careful when he clears the child's fluids and smiles at the boy's tiny wail. It is heart wrenching, as though he were in pain, but Stefanov assures that he is alright and healthy.

The hours passing by are a blur. The day ends sweetly, with their unnamed guests in their arms,

"I can't pick a name for them." Annie says.

The quieter boy is nestled over Mikasa's chest. The ex-corporal continues looking into his face, pointing out his stark resemblance to his mother, except for his dark hair. His brother's hair is lighter, and his facial features are a bit of his father's and mother's.

"This one reminds me of Armin." Annie mummers, pointing her chin at the one over Mikasa's chest. She is holding the louder one close as she nurses him over her rocking chair. Mikasa smiles gently as he kicks his little feet.

"He does. He was kind enough to let me hold him."

Annie nods. "I want to name this one Johann."

Mikasa looks up.

Annie gestures towards the fair headed one. "Johann. After my grandfather."

Mikasa nods. "That sounds good. I like it."

Annie smiles hesitantly, looking down over the other baby in Mikasa's arms. "Why don't you name him?"

Time stops. The unnamed baby in question whimpers softly, but Mikasa shushes him, pressing her lips over his forehead.

"I...don't know what to call him."

"It's alright, Mikasa," Annie says. "I would really like for you to name him, if that's alright with you."

Mikasa thinks deeply for a moment. She thinks about what happened today, and the anger she felt. She knows that not too many people will be happy that these boys were here. Today has taught her that. But looking into the child's face, she realizes that it didn't matter. She adjusts the child's cap over his head. His face squints a little, and he smells heavenly.

"Arnold."

* * *

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